Hiding

I’m in that kind of mood these days… Hiding away, thinking a lot, digesting what I read and hear, not having much to say out loud about it. It’s all rolling around me inside, totally alive, but outwardly quiet.

I read a friends post about isolation recently and it so clicked with me that it’s been in the forefront of my thoughts for several days. So freeing to be taken aside through isolation (spiritually). Maybe “taken aside” isn’t the correct description because I don’t feel that I’ve come off the path in this journey. I feel that I’m looking for and finding Jesus.

So many political things I could have been throwing out views on. So many religious views to debate. So many days just slogging through the work day. So many magical moments of encounters with God and people within all of these issues and viewpoints and boring old days.

My main recent decision? I’ve decided that every person is loved by Jesus and that their path to Him will look very different to mine. I don’t care if they believe in Him or not. They don’t have to measure up to my standards. Hell, if I’m honest, I don’t measure up to may standards!!! They are LOVED. And so am I.

Gay marriage? I don’t mind it. It doesn’t threaten me. I feel for them. I feel that if the Christians who truly believe its sin worked on loving those around them, straight or gay or anything in between, the world would be better off because of it. I don’t think the world, or my children, will be better off because of a debate about marriage.

Politics? I don’t have time for the power hungry. I believe politics do play a roll in these times, but not as big a roll as we give them. The undercurrents are full of the presence of God. That’s where I am choosing to look to gauge my life and times.

I’ve taken a leap off the tracks of the discussions about what church is, what should it be etc, etc, etc (thanks to a very concise and beautiful dream that gave me permission to do so!)

I still struggle in my day to day 9 to 5 job, but that’s ok for now. It isn’t heavy like it used to be. I’m hearing some things in my heart, I’m looking at a light at the end of the tunnel.

I love my friends and I miss England a lot these days. Really longing for their company, laughter, depth, and a good night out with them in an excellent pub.

I’m loved by my family and that’s just an awesome feeling. I love and enjoy my husband so much. My sons really do delight me. My parents bless me. I’m rich because of my family.

These are good days. I think it’s going to get better and better from here. I have so much to learn about everything!!!!

Wherever you are in your journey of life I hope you feel loved, I hope you have people around you who love you, and I hope you are continuing to learn to love. Without love, none of this means anything. If I can remember that, I think I’ll not waste my life. (remind me of that on the days I want to strangle my boss, ok??!!??). πŸ˜‰

Take care, guys. Good night.

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4 thoughts on “Hiding

  1. These are good days Shannon. Really enjoyed reading through this blog. Love what you share. Bless you loads in this ongoing adventure. If you ever get back to Britain we must raid a local pub to share stories of life together.

  2. Thank you. I will be back in Britain some day… especially Wales (You know Conrad Adams, right? He’s Eli’s godfather. Love that guy!)! And we most definitely will hit a pub and have some good conversation and laughs. Would love it!! Thank you for reading and encouraging. πŸ™‚

  3. matthew,
    Shannon, thanks for sharing. Good stuff. God brings light out of darkness and truth out of confusion. Pain, disappointments, hurts from others, hurts from ourselves, striving and not getting, feeling lost and meaningless, hard relationships with other humans…..and THEN God sheds light and a deeper way of truth is open to our eyes and we see what we did not see before and a peace comes over our troubled soul and resting in God’s love suddenly seems real and ok to do. One of my favorite quotes reminds me that like a good farmer, God doesn’t waste anything. Paraphrasing: And God causes ALL things to work together for our good, our struggles, lack of faith, circumstances,and even…yes our sin. I believe it ’cause I’ve seen it. I’ve looked back on troubled times and thanked God because out it came a greater revelation of His love for me and an ability to have more compassion on others. I love Mel Ainsworth’s zebra comparison. Life is like traveling on a zebra. We pass through the black and then the white and then the black and then we feel like we’re really not getting anywhere just repeating over and over again. What we miss understanding is as we repeat going over the black and white, we are actually progressing up the zebra. We are making progress passing through higher and higher places.

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